bedDear Her, I’ve been dating my current girl for a couple months now, but she’s so good in bed that it’s almost disturbing. I really want to ask about her past, how many guys she’s slept with, etc., but am not sure how it will blow over. Is this an OK question to ask a chick? Thanks.

Dear Him,

I can answer this simply by quoting Shaggy.

How you so good between the sheets? (Don’t ask her that)

Unless you’re looking to disclose your own sordid sexual past, that’s not a rabbit hole you want to go down, especially if it means a TON of other dudes have gone down it too.

Sure it’s an OK question to ask (good relationships are built on honesty!) but unless you’re prepared for a real answer, because unlike men and based on a stat I’m making up right now, women are less inclined to lie about their exploits, don’t ask her that. Worst case (depending on your definition of worst) scenario, she was a prostitute. Best case, she just slept with a lot of dudes, or one super duper stud dude who taught her everything she knows and subsequently will make you feel horribly insecure. You’ll find yourself stalking him on Instagram late night after she’s gone to bed, and wondering why your abs don’t look like his, or if he takes Propecia, or why he has 2k+ followers while you only have 100. Hint: it’s why she’s so good in bed. It’s also possible she slept with Shaggy. That dude has slept with a lot of women.

Really though, it’s not worth it. The ends don’t justify the means, and it doesn’t change anything. Asking her isn’t going to make her worse in bed, but there is a chance she will never get into one with you again.

Of all the things to whine about.

Come back next week when one of your other insecurities has ruined your relationship.

Love,

Her