Yeezus might have to change his name to Nayzus because the brooding dude has feuded with just about everyone but Ellen DeGeneres this year. So, as we prepare to sit down and break turkey this coming Thursday let’s give thanks that we aren’t being blackballed by the world’s number one naysayer.
1. Jimmy Kimmel.
“JIMMY KIMMEL IS OUT OF LINE TO TRY AND SPOOF IN ANY WAY THE FIRST PIECE OF HONEST MEDIA IN YEARS.”
2. The Walk of Fame
“There’s no way that Kim Kardashian shouldn’t have a star on the Walk of Fame.”
3. Flip Flops
“Shoes. You put on shoes everyday. You walkin’ down the street with no shoes, somebody might think there’s something wrong with you. You walkin’ down the street with no headphones, it’s like, ‘Oh what’s up? No headphones today? Cool!’ No shoes? ‘Look, man. What’s going on? You having problems with the family?’ Socks, at least. Sandals. Flip-flops. Sandals with socks. Keep it gangster. No flip-flops for black dudes. I don’t care where you at. No flip-flops on black dudes.”
4. Bruno Mars.
“Bruno Mars won all the motherf**king awards and s**t. And I was thinking about what Rick Rubin told me [ed note: just do your song and leave], because I don’t give a f**k about no TV show. But what I care about is if you’re an artist and you work hard as f**k and the streets say that you deserve that s**t. Then can’t no motherf**king networks try to gas everybody up so they can sell some product with the prettiest motherf**ker out.”
5. His Dentist
“I had this one dentist, and anytime he was cleaning my teeth, he would say something like, ‘Yo when I was at dentist school, and I was depressed’…and then he would always put it in music terms, he would be like, ‘It’d be like if you were in the studio.’ And I’d be like, ‘I understand English, you don’t have to put it in music terms for me when I understand motherf**king English!’”
6. All of Humanity
“Sometimes I wonder am I the only one that’s not crazy? Am I the only one who’s not beaten to submission?”
7. Michael Jackson
8. The Grammys
Because they still have not given him the awards he deserves.
In a podcast interview with Bret Easton Ellis Kanye sounded off on the web retailer and its CEO Tony Hsieh by calling their business a “s**t product.
10. South Park
“When I’m in Paris, and I’m sitting in Fashion Week for nine years, and South Park makes fun of our outfits, and people don’t understand why we’re there and I’m getting called names, stuff you can’t even say on like TV, and I still can’t break that wall down . . . who do you know that’s known more for clothes than me?”
We don’t know Kanye. We don’t know. Happy Thanksgiving.