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  1. She’ll occasionally put your interests ahead of hers, but not to the point where you can walk all over her. If something important to her should trump something you want, you should both be able to realize it and behave and compromise accordingly.
  2. She’s a really good kisser.
  3. They help to make your life less stressful than it would be without them.
  4. She’s down with cuddling but understands that most people don’t sleep all that well when stuck in a cuddling position for eight straight hours.
  5. She trusts you without fail, but doesn’t trust all those hoes tryin’ to run up on your spot.
  6. You have splendid sexual chemistry, are unafraid to communicate in the sack about what you like and what you don’t, and the two of you have a comparable sex drive.
  7. Comfortable silences come easy to you.
  8. You both realize the value of alone time and are diligent about getting it when you feel like you need it.
  9. The importance of friendship is a value you both share, and she doesn’t have an issue if not all of your friendships constantly overlap.
  10. She got a booty.
  11. She gets along with your family members, unless of course your family members are terrible assholes who nobody likes.
  12. She believes in gender equality, but won’t get upset when you occasionally make jokes about how she can’t drive or shouldn’t leave the kitchen. Better yet, she lobs back jokes about how you won’t ask for directions and can’t cook to save your life.
  13. Whether you’re constantly in contact or go an entire workday without exchanging even a text or Gchat, you’re both fine with the level and frequency of communication.
  14. She moves at the same pace you do. You’re both ready to get serious at the same time. You’re both ready to say “I Love You” at the same time. You’re both ready to procreate at the same time, if this is something you decide you would like to do.
  15. She can make you laugh, especially when you need it most.
  16. She doesn’t automatically take your side when you’re whining about your boss or some sort of obstacle. She looks at things objectively, and in doing so helps you realize when you’re acting like a self-centered idiot. Basically, she doesn’t shy away from real talk, and is, essentially, your anchor, bro.
  17. She respects your individual fashion sense and won’t nag at you when you haven’t gotten a haircut for a little while.
  18. She supports the freakin’ hell out of your sorry ass.
  19. You cannot imagine what your life would be without her, and the time before her when you were trying to find her seems like a distant dream.
  20. You’re comfortable with each other’s bodies in a non-sexual way. I mean, you don’t have to hold in farts around each other, and you’re totally down to hold her hair back when she vomits after a Fireball drink-off with your friend’s Bostonian wife.
  21. Occasionally, your idea of a great time on a Friday night is just staying in with her and watching a movie and then 69ing and going to sleep without setting the Saturday morning alarm.
  22. If she doesn’t share your beliefs, she respects them and doesn’t try to force hers on you. I would be totally down marrying a religious woman (especially Catholics because those girls are freaks—trust me) as long as she didn’t try to make me become one and allowed me to teach our eventual children about how the world really came to be.
  23. Everything she does interests you in spite of yourself. “Oh, she’s knitting? That’s sexy! What the hell is wrong with me?”
  24. Your friends and family agree that she is the one for you. These are the people who know you best, and knew you before you knew her. Their opinion matters to a certain extent.
  25. Chuck Klosterman once wrote that “Every relationship is fundamentally a power struggle, and the individual in power is whoever likes the other person less.” When you’ve found the person who likes you precisely as much as you like them, the search is over. Don’t ever let that one go.