knittingThere is something just so sexy about a woman who knits. And this is not some sort of weird yarn fetish, though yarn in and of itself can be sexy. A woman who has taken the time to learn the fine art of knitting is certified sex on a platter. Watching a female knit immediately makes me think of three things:

1)     She is industrious.

2)     She is artistic.

3)     She needs to keep her hands busy.

All of the above are sexiness personified.

I love that knitting has become so popular in the past several years. Pilates? Meh. Wine collecting? Snore. Posting images of food on Instagram? Stop. Knitting trumps all of these. Give me a woman with two knitting needles and a big ass ball of orange yarn and I am a man in love.

Speaking of knitting needles, how cool is it when you see a girl work those bad boys at top speed? It is mesmerizing. She is the same as a hardcore, dangerous ninja warrior princess except the end result is a nice wool cap instead of an impaling.

Another part of the sexiness is the multi-tasking. A woman’s ability to knit an intricate pattern while watching Scandal and still be able to hold a conversation all at the same time is intoxicating. How are they able to commit to all three so effectively? It’s like watching a rhythmic gymnast working a dance routine with clubs. I can’t take my eyes off it. (Note: Please don’t think a rhythmic gymnast who works with clubs is the same as juggling. It is not. Unlike knitting, juggling is the exact opposite of sexy.)

An activity that has been universally practiced throughout the ages definitely deserves to be acknowledged. That kind of longevity definitely adds to the sexiness. For example, the French have a name for a woman who knits – “tricoteuse.” The term started being used in the French Revolution to describe women who would sit beside the guillotine and knit while people were publically beheaded. The only thing in that entire scenario that is remotely sexy? Yup – the knitting.

Knitting is the delicious combination of generosity and selfishness. You never see a woman knit something to wear for herself. She is always knitting for someone else. Even if she is a recluse at the very least she is knitting for her multitude of cats. And yet, if you ask a woman why she knits you would more than likely get the response, “I’m addicted. I can’t stop.” The act of knitting is for herself. The result of knitting is for everyone else. How is that not sexy?

By the way, if a girl you are dating knits you something – anything – wear it. All. The. Time. In fact, do more than just wear it. (All. The. Time.) Talk about how much you love it. Show it off to friends and family. Mention that you wish she would make you more. Trust me, your thoughtfulness will be paid back to you…tenfold.

Knitting is a natural aphrodisiac. So you can keep your strippers dripping in body glitter and smelling like they just walked out of a Yankee Candle. Girls like that are a dime a dozen. Give me a woman who wears glasses while knitting a scarf, all the while binge watching House of Cards and drinking cup after cup of Macha green tea.

You know a girl like that is ready to party.